Up there as one of your best, Clancy, in my humble opinion. Thoroughly enjoyed, not just because of what you told and where it went and the spot-on character of Earle, but because of the flow and prose and wit of it.
Like this:
"...because she ate TV dinners from the freezer case of a convenience store once a day for twenty years and smoked all the time and consequently has the type of diabetes that one acquires and is not born with, and an oxygen tank of a size befitting a scuba diver."
Sensational. Love it.
Now, the bluebird...
You know, my first thought when he first saw it was that he was going to have a change of heart, so I'm glad you subverted my expectation there and he still took the shot.
Thank you Nathan! Yeah I thought of going that direction as well. But despite its tone and humor, I think this is kind of a story about the way things stay the same and we all perpetuate the system. And in the end, no one needs to kill the bluebird because, in a sense, it’s already dead, if that makes sense. Or maybe he missed on purpose? Who knows.
Re-reading your nice comment, and I wanted to add since I know you’ll appreciate it:
That line you pointed out, that whole sentence — I can totally see the Michael Chabon influence there in that way the author you’re reading seeps into your work. I’ve read a couple of his books this month. Too soon to say he’s a favorite, but have a feeling he’ll graduate to that. I read Summerland by him as a kid and recently re-read it and I realized it was the first sort of “lit fic” book I read that made me feel very adult-y and inspired me to write that way.
But the gist is just trying to add SOMETHING extra to every sentence, often humorously so, and kind of trying to make every sentence a “warm hug” as one of the blurbs of his books says.
Awesome. I'm so into this whole absorbing-what/who-you're-reading thing. It has a huge impact on my own writing. If I'm reading something and I just don't feel all that much from the author's prose then it has a sort of subduing effect on me, whereas when reading something where I really connect with the prose then that just fills me with this intense creative lust.
I also liked this line and the movement of things in the small spaces to demonstrate masculinity or fear etc and thinking about the way we are shaped by our proximity to things/people.
“Another is to ingloriously try and shoo the bird with a broom toward the exit in a way that feels faintly emasculating.”
I DEF see the Coen brothers, which I take as a huge compliment, never would have drawn that comparison myself but I totally see it.
I assume you mean Cormac McCarthy, whom I have never read, so that's interesting. I always figured his subject matter was too intense for me (although, he also has a great mustache)
i really love the interrogation of banality and the dry observational humour in this short. I would see the dying of this bird as a metaphor for Earle's life in the store. he won't escape it alive either. and the irony is that he is the author of his own destiny to live - a dead kind of life - in the store where he kills beautiful flying things rather than try and help them to escape.
Thanks for reading Nick! What great insight. I think you are absolutely right. it’s about being trapped, voluntarily or not. but ultimately, it’s in his control, even if he doesn’t know it.
probably my favorite story I've read in a while. Clancy's works always have a flow to them; they're like those white fingers of cartoon smells tapping at your face and leading you to a window sill pie.
What really makes it - in my humble opinion - is the stark transition between the prose and the profane. You have this great sweeping sentence (“epoch!” “urbanites”!) that is elegantly crafted followed by “huge ass trucks”. A direct downshift that sets the tone for the whole piece. And it was goddam glorious. Glorious, I say.
Thank you jack. one must not be afraid to shift gears in the manner of a truck! Thanks for breaking and down and analyzing what you liked about it. I think substack needs more of that in the fiction community. check out my “finding the lit” series to find me breaking down some stuff I like about fiction authors i find on substack!
Earle is a classic. He puts more effort into killing a bird than he does at his regular job. Lots of fun in this tale. The description of his mother is a hoot. TV dinners: the processed food they say is killing us all. The produce department reminds me of one of my local grocers. The prices are right, but you have to choose carefully.
Look I'm not answering your homework questions but this story is top notch in entertainment value
Thanks! I hope you mean that in the best way possible hahah
This made me genuinely laugh out loud, C.J. (I hope you don't mind, Clancy, hehe.)
Not at all! It is of course meant to be humorous :)
Up there as one of your best, Clancy, in my humble opinion. Thoroughly enjoyed, not just because of what you told and where it went and the spot-on character of Earle, but because of the flow and prose and wit of it.
Like this:
"...because she ate TV dinners from the freezer case of a convenience store once a day for twenty years and smoked all the time and consequently has the type of diabetes that one acquires and is not born with, and an oxygen tank of a size befitting a scuba diver."
Sensational. Love it.
Now, the bluebird...
You know, my first thought when he first saw it was that he was going to have a change of heart, so I'm glad you subverted my expectation there and he still took the shot.
Thank you Nathan! Yeah I thought of going that direction as well. But despite its tone and humor, I think this is kind of a story about the way things stay the same and we all perpetuate the system. And in the end, no one needs to kill the bluebird because, in a sense, it’s already dead, if that makes sense. Or maybe he missed on purpose? Who knows.
Yeah, absolutely makes sense and you really got it right, I feel.
Re-reading your nice comment, and I wanted to add since I know you’ll appreciate it:
That line you pointed out, that whole sentence — I can totally see the Michael Chabon influence there in that way the author you’re reading seeps into your work. I’ve read a couple of his books this month. Too soon to say he’s a favorite, but have a feeling he’ll graduate to that. I read Summerland by him as a kid and recently re-read it and I realized it was the first sort of “lit fic” book I read that made me feel very adult-y and inspired me to write that way.
But the gist is just trying to add SOMETHING extra to every sentence, often humorously so, and kind of trying to make every sentence a “warm hug” as one of the blurbs of his books says.
I’m sure I’ll point it out in a retro later.
Awesome. I'm so into this whole absorbing-what/who-you're-reading thing. It has a huge impact on my own writing. If I'm reading something and I just don't feel all that much from the author's prose then it has a sort of subduing effect on me, whereas when reading something where I really connect with the prose then that just fills me with this intense creative lust.
I also liked this line and the movement of things in the small spaces to demonstrate masculinity or fear etc and thinking about the way we are shaped by our proximity to things/people.
“Another is to ingloriously try and shoo the bird with a broom toward the exit in a way that feels faintly emasculating.”
Thanks Kate! I liked that line too. I think it's telling too that the masculine thing is to...let the bird live?? it doesn't need to be.
I was telling Nathan, maybe at the end, he misses the bird on purpose...
Enjoying this meta. Really found some Cormac going on here, too. But in a Coen brothers adaptation sort of way.
Great story, Clancy!
I DEF see the Coen brothers, which I take as a huge compliment, never would have drawn that comparison myself but I totally see it.
I assume you mean Cormac McCarthy, whom I have never read, so that's interesting. I always figured his subject matter was too intense for me (although, he also has a great mustache)
thanks for reading kate!!
Hah, yeah, I can totally see that now that you say it!
nice work, one of the best stories I've read here on substack
Thanks Nem! Glad you found me and gave it a try.
We read stories by Steadwell "about a guy who drives a truck" because of lines like these:
"Yams are unorganized."
"...following the rules isn’t really what Earle is good at."
"...the apocalyptic state of his store’s produce department..."
"... he dreams about attaching his mother’s oxygen tank to the back of her electric scooter and igniting it with one of her cigarettes..."
And that last line is a real cracker.
Thank you so much for reading Sharron :D
I’ve never known a man quite like Earle
But I’ve once met a shy, ginger-haired girl
Who had a dead bluebird
Stashed in a cupboard
Her name was Miss Sue-Annie Pearl
Perfect. Please, we need more poems in comments on Substack at large.
there was a convenience store
that sucked out your life like a whore.
you could roam through the aisle
with a gun not a smile
and carry on just as before.
Perfect!!!
At your service. Just keep supplying killer prose.
Shucks. Thanks Mr. Ghillis.
Aw, snap! This is good. I loved Earle! I feel like this should not be the last time we see him.
Haha, I don't have any plans for him, but we'll see! Thanks for reading Ricardo.
i really love the interrogation of banality and the dry observational humour in this short. I would see the dying of this bird as a metaphor for Earle's life in the store. he won't escape it alive either. and the irony is that he is the author of his own destiny to live - a dead kind of life - in the store where he kills beautiful flying things rather than try and help them to escape.
Thanks for reading Nick! What great insight. I think you are absolutely right. it’s about being trapped, voluntarily or not. but ultimately, it’s in his control, even if he doesn’t know it.
Beautiful words. Beautiful prose. Thanks for sharing.
Beautiful compliment. Thanks, Nick!
probably my favorite story I've read in a while. Clancy's works always have a flow to them; they're like those white fingers of cartoon smells tapping at your face and leading you to a window sill pie.
This is terrific. The first sentence juxtaposed with the first quote got me early. Really outstanding.
Thank you jack! I love that first sentence as well, I worked hard on it.
What really makes it - in my humble opinion - is the stark transition between the prose and the profane. You have this great sweeping sentence (“epoch!” “urbanites”!) that is elegantly crafted followed by “huge ass trucks”. A direct downshift that sets the tone for the whole piece. And it was goddam glorious. Glorious, I say.
Thank you jack. one must not be afraid to shift gears in the manner of a truck! Thanks for breaking and down and analyzing what you liked about it. I think substack needs more of that in the fiction community. check out my “finding the lit” series to find me breaking down some stuff I like about fiction authors i find on substack!
Earle is a classic. He puts more effort into killing a bird than he does at his regular job. Lots of fun in this tale. The description of his mother is a hoot. TV dinners: the processed food they say is killing us all. The produce department reminds me of one of my local grocers. The prices are right, but you have to choose carefully.
Thanks KC, glad you loved the character. It was really fun to write.
great little read! thank you!
Thank YOU for reading Samantha.
Fucking hell this was good.
Thanks Rebecca! Glad you read it.
This story brings me to my hometown of Bakersfield, CA. Thanks!
Thanks Vince. I hope it reminds folks of their hometowns all over.